Royal Oak, MI - A Profile in Courage and Sportsmanship

It's been a while since I posted my whereabouts. Since the beginning of the year I have been to Minneapolis and back six times. Last week I was in Ohio for a change. Sadly, I didn't venture beyond the hotel. Maybe it was the ice storm that first night that left a 1/2 inch layer of ice all over the car that I had to chip through Monday morning. I'm sure there were some neat things to see there; if I go back in better weather, I'll write about them.

But this week finds me home doing things around the house - unclogging drains, getting cars running, cleaning the house, etc. One of the perks of being home is the opportunity to spend more time with our beautiful children - taking them to and from school, talking around the house. So far it has been a fantastic week.

Yesterday, Benjamin had a wrestling meet in Royal Oak, Michigan - about a 20-minute drive from the house. So after school I grabbed the video camera and headed over to the gymnasium. Once in the gym I found Benjamin and said "Hi" to him. I noticed he already had some absorbing material crammed up his nose. Come to find out that he got a nosebleed during warmups. No big deal, I thought; the bleeding will stop and he'll do fine.

This year Benjamin is wrestling the heavyweight class which, in middle school, is over 200 pounds. As he stepped out onto the mat for his match I noticed that while Benjamin was taller, his opponent was heavier. I wasn't worried; when we wrestled at home I learned that Benjamin could handle larger bodies.

As the match got underway it was clear that Benjamin's opponent was every bit as strong as him, but with a lower center of gravity. As the two went for the same throw at the same time, that lower center of gravity paid off and Benjamin was under. But Benjamin escaped and tried to work back for another throw.

Suddenly Benjamin motioned to the referee, who blew his whistle. Apparently Benjamin's nose started bleeding again, and it needed to be stopped. So in the nose went more absorbing material while both wrestlers and the mat were cleaned up. I wish that were the only stoppage, but his nose bled twice more. Each time involved more wipedowns and more material up Benjamin's nose. By the end of the second period Benjamin was pretty winded partly due to his inability to breathe clearly through his nose.

Benjamin took a big breath and started the third period in the bottom position and behind in points, 5-3. A few seconds later the referee awarded Benjamin a penalty point as his opponent had an illegal hand lock. The restart saw Benjamin again on the bottom position getting pummeled into the mat. But with a burst of energy he stood up and worked his opponents wrists to free himself with 40 seconds to go, tying the score at 5-5. Both boys knew that the next takedown would decide the match. And with about seven seconds to go they once again locked up, each looking for a winning head-and-arm throw.

As Benjamin gave one last heave his opponent lost his balance and fell on the inside of Benjamin's leg, twisting his knee and ankle. Immediately Benjamin screamed in pain and the referee blew the whistle. For about five minutes Benjamin lay there while his coach came out onto the mat and looked him over. Eventually getting back up on his good leg Benjamin was helped off the mat and back to his chair. Unable to continue, Benjamin was disqualified.

I couldn't have been more proud of my son and his valiant effort. I rushed down from the stands to his side. There, with the blood streaming from his nose and dripping from his chin he was on the verge of tears. I hugged him and told him how proud I was of him and how much I loved him. He gave it his all, and was on the verge of winning the most dramatic match of the meet. (Yes I am biased, but it was that good.)

But what followed was even more remarkable.

As I was looking to get change for the vending machine, one of the Royal Oak teachers offered me a water bottle for Benjamin from his office. Another Royal Oak trainer asked whether we needed another ice pad for Benjamin's knee. And as I was walking back I went over to Benjamin's opponent and congratulated him on a well-fought match. His response? "I'm sorry for hurting him - I hope he's OK." And at the end of the meet, with Benjamin still seated, every member of the Royal Oak Middle School wrestling team - coaches, trainers and wrestlers - walked all the way over to shake Benjamin's hand and wish him well. Their heavyweights, including Benjamin's opponent, lingered for a few minutes to chat with him and talk about the County meet in less than three weeks. And as I went to bring the car around to the near side of the gymnasium that same teacher made sure that Benjamin had a chair to sit on by the door.

I've been around school athletics for a while. What I've learned is that the students often reflect the attitudes of their coaches. Some teams come off as arrogant or rude. Others come across as mean-spirited or angry. And then there are groups like the wrestling team at Royal Oak Middle School. From the head coach who I talked with briefly to the wrestlers on the team, they were a classy and genuine bunch who let their wrestling do the talking.

And like Benjamin said, "I'll see them again at the County meet. I can't wait."

Me neither.